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A picture like this brings back a lot of memories, it also reminds me of how pretty my mom is.  The baby is my cousin Andrew, Barry's brother Michael's son.  He's now a big boy.  At that time Mom and Barry weren't divorced yet.

I remember their divorce in two ways: Barry's whims and mom's 9-5ism.  Concerning Barry's whims I remember how mom tried for years to get counseling, seek advice, get a mediator etc.  I don't think she'd easily talk about divorce to Barry--it's also wouldn't be very ethical to threaten people that way.  So you can only do your best to drop hints, and in this case they were very big hints.  And I wouldn't talk about things as his way or her way, I can only think about the way things should be and see if two people can agree on that.  And all the talk about compromise I also can't really understand, because logic is logic, and whatever comes as a result of discussion should follow this logic strictly.  But in the end it seemed to be a debate of feelings, and that doesn't seem too solvable.  If I have to look at Barry's whims, I think my mom was more right than Barry.

As for the second part, "9-5ism", I understand Barry best.  I can understand working in the home, the destruction of the barrier between work and home.  I can support Barry's idea about taking up projects for yourself, being your own boss and maybe other people's boss, all in a flexible and fun context.  I don't think I've ever had more fun working than I did for Barry.  But freelancing is inconceivable to my mom, and there were as many debates over projects in the house as there were about Bowers' family gatherings.

Ten very happy years of my childhood were spent with Barry and his family.  So even though I understand why they got divorced, I still feel a little welling in my eyes when I see a picture like this.  

It was great to be a part of it while it lasted, and I thank everybody who was involved.

Family